


I Am Never Wearing Bowties Again

by orphan_account



Category: Doctor Who, Glee
Genre: Crossover, Gen, I'm still kind of high on Eleven, M/M, and I wrote this when I was still high on Eleven, because Kurt would be an awesome companion, posting my fics to my new AO3 account, this is purely for self indulgent purposes, to be perfectly honest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-29
Updated: 2012-09-29
Packaged: 2017-11-15 07:12:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/524568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doctor Who crossover. The TARDIS drops The Doctor and Kurt off outside a private school in Westerville and, naturally, they decide to check it out. Kurt might find a bit more than he bargained for though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I just finished watching Doctor Who a few months ago and naturally I fell head over heels in love with it, and since I love Klaine too, why not combine the two? That was what thought a few months ago at least when this demanded to be written. 
> 
> Basically the thought of companion!Kurt just really appealed to me. This takes place somewhere after season 6 of DW and in the beginning of season 2 of Glee.

”No.”

The Doctor hurried to follow his companion who had quickly retreated back into the TARDIS, leaning against the doorframe and pouting at the stubborn boy. “Oh come on Kurt, you know we always end up in these places for a reason! We can’t just _leave,_ that would be terribly rude.”

“I don’t care, I’m not going out there.”

“Kurt—“

“No.” Kurt crossed his arms tightly over his chest and glared in that terrifying way he always did when he was scared. “Doctor, you promised me. You _promised me_ that I would never have to go back there, that I would never have to deal with that homophobic hell hole ever again. You _promised.”_

The Doctor looked guilty for a second before he started pleading again. “I know, but this isn’t Lima! This is… well, I don’t know how far from Lima we are, but we’re not there anyway!”

Kurt pressed his lips together in frustration. “This is Westerville, which is located only two hours away from Lima. Which means that we’re still in Ohio.”

“But not in Lima!” the Doctor exclaimed triumphantly but quickly shrunk back when Kurt kept glaring. He sighed. “Look, you know I would never make you go out there unless it was something important, right? The TARDIS never sends us to these random places if we aren’t needed, and that means that people are in danger out there. Are you really saying that we’re not going to help them just because they happen to live in Ohio?”

Kurt was silent for a long time, his blue eyes never leaving the Doctor’s ancient ones. Finally he sighed deeply and let his shoulders slump in defeat. “Fine. Just… fine. But you owe me big time, Doctor. I’m talking several shopping trips and a visit at that planet with the famous spas you mentioned.”

The Doctor pursed his lips. “Deal. Now-” He grinned and held the TARDIS door open with an exaggerated flourish that made Kurt roll his eyes with a smile. “Let’s see what my girl wants us to do this time.”

oOoOo

Blaine made his way down the corridor with the air of someone who had done this a thousand times and didn’t even have to think about what they were doing anymore. Which was lucky, because Dalton was a big school with a lot of corridors to get lost in and Blaine was way too preoccupied with going over the steps for the next Warbler performance to think about where he was going. He still had the sense to answer the greetings from the other students he met on the way though – manners was something that was way too deeply ingrained in his head for him to ignore people, no matter how distracted he was. It still felt weird sometimes, the greetings and bright smiles from the other boys. It might have gone almost a year since his transfer to Dalton, but he suspected that a part of him would always be expecting the shoves and insults he’d been subjected to at his old school. He wasn’t nearly as skittish as he had been when he’d first transferred though, so that was always something.

He reached his history class and sat down in his usual seat near the front, digging out his books and notes from his bag and placing them on his desk.

“Hey.” Nick leaned over from the desk on Blaine’s left. “Did you hear that Mr. Garrison quit?”

Blaine frowned. “Wait, really?”

Nick nodded. “Yep. Apparently he got an invitation to work at some really prestigious university in Michigan. Real sudden, left yesterday.”

“Oh. Well, good for him I guess. Does that mean we’ll get a—”

“A substitute, yes. Splendid, perfectly correct! Ten points to— no wait, that’s Harry Potter. Oh well, kudos to you anyway you unfortunately greasy haired boy!”

A tall man with gangly limbs and floppy brown hair strode into the classroom. He was clad in a brown tweed jacket, rolled up pants, a pale red shirt and a simple red bowtie, and he was probably English judging by his accent. He looked young and quite handsome, Blaine thought, and he definitely earned some bonus points for the bowtie.

“Um, it’s not grease, it’s—“

“No no, it’s fine, nothing to be ashamed of! I know what it’s like to luck out in the hair department, although I do think it’s quite fetching this time around.” He blew a strand of hair out of his eyes and grinned in a way that made him look both adorable and slightly retarded at the same time.

“Anyway, my name’s Mr. Smith and I will be your history teacher for at least the next couple of days! Hello!”

He looked expectantly at the class and most boys murmured a confused and/or amused greeting.

“Excellent!” Mr. Smith strode over to the desk and hopped up to sit on top of it. He looked out over the class and rubbed his hands together in excitement. “Well then, what shall we talk about? The Romans? Queen Victoria? Da Vinci? Lovely man, Leo, if perhaps a bit eccentric. Never washed his feet on Tuesdays for some reason.”

Trent hesitantly raised his hand. “Um, we’re actually supposed to be reading about ancient Greece right now, sir.”

Mr. Smith made a happy noise and clapped his hands together. “Excellent choice! Now, let me tell you about Socrates and the market incident he doesn’t know that I know about…”

oOoOo

“I can’t believe he talked me into this,” Kurt muttered to himself as he followed the crowd of uniform clad students down the elaborate staircase. He had no idea what was going on, the Doctor still didn’t know what was wrong with this school and, while he as looked flawless as ever, Kurt didn’t blend in with the other boys at all. Seriously, the Doctor could have at least gotten him a uniform but noooo, Kurt was a big boy, he would be fine on his own.

_Ugh._

At least he got to play spy with his fabulous new sunglasses, which he now lowered to scan the crowd for someone to ask what all the fuss was about. He stopped a boy at random and decided to hope for the best.

“Excuse me? Hi, can I ask you a question? I’m new here.” That was safe enough, and it would give the guy room to say no if he didn’t want to give Kurt the time of day. God knows the odds would have been microscopic at McKinley.

The boy turned around and holy shit, this guy was _cute._ And he was carrying a pocket watch, how charming was that?

The boy smiled and extended his hand. “My name’s Blaine,” he said and if Kurt swooned a little he hoped it didn’t show.

“Kurt,” he said as he shook his hand. “So, what’s going on?”

The boy’s eyes lit up. “The Warblers!” he said and hell, Kurt didn’t even care what the Warblers were if it made Blaine smile like that. “Sometimes they throw impromptu performances in the senior commons and it tends to shut the school down for a while.” Oh, so the Warblers was this school’s glee club.

“Wait, so the glee club here is kind of cool?” Kurt asked with slight disbelief. If New Directions had tried to throw an impromptu performance at McKinley they would have been mass slushied before they’d reached the first chorus.

“The Warblers are like rock stars,” Blaine said confidently and Kurt didn’t even care how ridiculous that sounded because the other boy was smiling at him again and oh god, boys _never_ smiled at Kurt.

“Come on, I’ll show you!” And they definitely never grabbed his hand and started pulling him down empty corridors. Blaine’s hand was warm and strong around his own and Kurt could feel the blood rushing in his ears as they jogged. This was the first time a boy had ever seemed comfortable enough around him to touch him (The Doctor didn’t count and should never be thought of in the context of touching ever again, ew) and it made his mind reel. Who was this boy and why was he messing with Kurt’s head like this?

The senior commons was already crowded when they reached it and it made Kurt even more aware of how out of place he looked. Someone was going to beat him up at the end of this day, he was sure of it. Why did he pick today of all days to wear bondage shorts? “I stick out like a sore thumb,” he breathed out, mostly to himself.

Blaine seemed to think the comment was meant for him though “Well next time don’t forget your jacket, new kid,” he said and reached out to briefly fiddle with the lapel of Kurt’s jacket. “You’ll fit right in.”

… Did he just _wink_ at him? Seriously, what was the matter with this guy? Had he not gotten the memo that Kurt was a dangerous predator or was he just really thick?

The boys in the center of the room started to harmonize and Blaine, who seemed oblivious to Kurt’s inner confusion, turned around to face them. “Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

Kurt was confused for only a second longer before Blaine opened his mouth.

… He was the lead singer of the Warblers, and he was singing an acapella version of “Teenage Dream.” And he was doing it well. _Really_ well. And he was looking at Kurt the entire time.

“Oh god, Doctor,” Kurt breathed out. “What kind of trouble have you gotten me into this time?”


	2. Chapter 2

Kurt walked down one of Dalton's many lushly decorated corridors with a thoughtful expression on his face. The reason for his mulling was, of course, the boy he had met earlier that day whose name he had learnt was Blaine Anderson. After the performance in the common room Blaine and two other students, Wes and David, had dragged him off to the Dalton cafeteria to "talk". By "talk" Kurt had assumed they meant "beat into a pulp" or possibly "press charges for spying", but when Kurt had expressed this concern they'd all laughed and called his failed spying mission, of all things, endearing.

_Endearing._

Kurt shook his head incredulously as he came to a stop in front of one of the doors at the end of the corridor and knocked firmly. He could hear someone yelp inside which was followed by a loud thump. Kurt rolled his eyes fondly and tapped his foot in feigned impatience as the door finally opened to reveal a smiling, if disheveled, Doctor.

"You fell off the chair, didn't you?"

"The desk, actually," the Doctor replied happily. "I had to test how sturdy it was so I climbed on top of it. Turns out it's perfectly suitable to stand on as long as you're not startled by impatient American teenagers knocking away on your office door." The last part was said with a pointed tone before his face suddenly lit up again. "My office door, Kurt! I have an _office!"_

"Hey, watch that tone or the TARDIS might get jealous," Kurt joked as he strode past the excited alien before coming to an abrupt halt in the middle of the room. "What have you been doing in here, you lunatic? Did you have to test the sturdiness of every single piece of furniture before you were satisfied?"

"Of course not, don't be daft, Hummel. I was checking for signs of alien life forms... And testing the paper shredder. Really, it's quite entertaining."

"I'm sure it is," Kurt drawled. "I take it you didn't find anything?"

"Not in here," the Doctor conceded. "But I can't exactly go waving my screwdriver around in the classrooms, that would be rude and cause entirely too much trouble, which is why I asked you to come here. We need to go poking around the school tonight when no one will bother us. What about you, did you have any luck?"

Kurt raised an eyebrow in a far too familiar manner. "Well, since _someone_ didn't deem it necessary to get me a uniform I had to spend most of the day explaining why I was even here in the first place. I had to come up with a cover story about how I still went to McKinley and had been sent here to spy on their glee club, the Warblers, except Blaine didn't believe me so I had to tell him about the bullying to explain-"

"Whoa, hold up a second," the Doctor interrupted. "Who's _Blaine?_ Wait, is he the little guy with greasy hair that smiles a lot?"

Kurt frowned as his body tensed up. He hadn't meant to mention Blaine. "It's hair gel. And he's just this guy I met who took me to see the Warblers perform and have coffee. We've both been through a lot because of our sexualities. We bonded."

"Bonded, huh?" the Doctor remarked, seemingly intrigued. "So little Kurt Hummel has bonded with a boy who buys him coffee. A courting gesture among humans, I've gathered…"

Kurt blushed and cleared his throat in an attempt to gather himself (why couldn't the Doctor be oblivious when Kurt needed him to be?). "There was no "courting" involved. He brought two of his friends along and then I turned into a sobbing mess as we exchanged our woes about public schools - there was nothing romantic involved what so ever. And besides, just because he's the first person I've met who's gay besides me ("The first _human_ , most non-human civilizations doesn't care about gender when it comes to their partners. Although some are very picky about other things, like the Yarqs who won't mate with any species with less than three fingers." "Yes, _fine_ , the first gay _human_.”) it doesn't mean that I will fall head over heels for him! And-"

"Whoa, take it easy there mister! I was only pointing out an observation, there's no need to get snappy with me," the Doctor said as he held up his hands in mock surrender, eyebrows raised. "I'll let it go if you want me to, geez."

"Thank you," Kurt said stiffly before letting his shoulders slump as he let out a quiet sigh. "I'm sorry for snapping at you, I'm a bit on edge, that's all. Anyway, I tried to ask about any weird things going on at Dalton, but he didn't really give me much to work with - just that all the boys were extremely tired lately because of ongoing exams and mentions of old ghost tales that comes with all old buildings like this one." He paused. "I can try to get more out of him tomorrow though. You know, if we're still here tomorrow."

The alien man shrugged. "That depends on what we find tonight, I'm afraid."

"No, I… I know, it's fine. It'll be nice to be out of here as soon as possible anyway." The Doctor grinned in reply before turning to fiddle with his screwdriver, leaving Kurt to his own thoughts. It was true, what he'd told his companion - he _would_ be glad to leave this place, but…

He shook his head firmly to rid himself of his thoughts. Blaine was nobody, just a cute guy who he'd met in passing and would soon be forgotten, not to mention that Blaine certainly wouldn't miss Kurt. Just as the thought went through his head his phone buzzed to signal a message. He fished out the phone and unlocked the screen, expecting it to be from his dad but feeling his breath catch when he realized what it said.

**From: Blaine Anderson :)**

**Courage**

… Or maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't be able to forget Blaine very easily at all.

oOoOo

Blaine couldn't sleep.

He wasn't sure _why_ he couldn't sleep – he’d been out like a light as soon as his head hit the pillow lately. The only sleep related issues in his life were the occasional nightmare about the dance, but they were getting steadily less frequent as time went by and had less to do with falling asleep as going _back_ to sleep. He had also started an annoying habit of waking up way too late for the last two weeks. He wasn't the only one though, more than half of the students in his morning classes were having the same problem; Trent had even gotten thrown out of class for falling asleep at his desk and the only reason Jeff’s loud snore didn’t give him away last Friday was that Nick covered it up with a cough. It was the curse of too much homework and teenage hormones, he was sure.

He sighed and rolled over, trying in vain to get comfortable for what must have been the hundredth time and glanced at his bedside clock.

01.37 AM.

He groaned in frustration and glared up at the ceiling. And his day had been going so deceivingly well too - he'd had a history lesson with an attractive teacher that had actually been fun, if a bit crazy, for once, he'd nailed his solo and he'd met Kurt.

_Kurt._

Blaine had absolutely no idea what to do about Kurt. He was attractive, that was for sure - hell, he was beautiful and Blaine swore that his breath had caught for a moment when he'd first laid eyes on him on that staircase. He'd have asked him out in a heartbeat after that performance if Kurt hadn't broken down like that when he spoke about what he went through at school. Blaine had been in Kurt's shoes and he knew that he would have given anything to have a mentor last year, someone who understood what he was going through and that he could look up to. And with his, admittedly limited, experience with romance Blaine was sure that he'd be a far better mentor than boyfriend. He would view Kurt in a platonic way from now on and that was that. And besides, there was a very real possibility that Kurt didn't see him as boyfriend material at all.

*CRASH*

Blaine was startled out of his thoughts by a muffled sound, as if someone had tripped over something. Who the hell was up at this hour? _I swear, if it’s Cameron sneaking back in drunk again I will strangle him._

… But, well, he was already awake and he wasn't a bad friend. He might as well help him get back to his room in one piece and lecture him tomorrow, and with that thought he dragged himself out of bed and sneaked out into the corridor. He made his way out of the dormitory corridor and down the stairs that led to the actual school before he heard hushed voices.

"— urt, I couldn't have known that they'd have put a plant there! It sneaked up on me!"

"Don't blame this on the plant, mister - you tripped, suck it up. I just hope we didn't wake anyone or we'll be in some real trouble."

"Don't be so skittish, Kurt, and stop your frowning. You'll get those wrinkles you're always going on about. Geez, remember when I took you to Gettro 67 and you refused to get out of the TARDIS until I got you some sunscreen?"

"Oh yes. You told me that there was no such thing on that planet or in the TARDIS and I had to walk around with one of your giant umbrellas to avoid getting tanned."

"I thought it looked fetching."

"It was like a big orange tent, Doctor. _Orange.”_

"But everyone complimented you on it, didn't they?"

"Mmm, they did. They were very odd back there, though I did appreciate their eccentric clothing for the most part. Really, it wasn't even that hard to alter away the extra arms on the shirts I bought."

Blaine had stopped dead when he recognized who the voices belonged to. It wasn't very hard as both Kurt and his new history teacher had very distinct voices - what was harder, though, was trying figure out what they were doing sneaking around the school in the middle of the night. Not to mention making sense of what they were saying. Blaine scrunched up his thick eyebrows in confusion. The TARDIS, Doctor, planets, extra arms - were they insane? Or… He blanched. What if Kurt and his teacher were _lovers?_ That was why people had secret meetings in the night, wasn't it? Was this some kind of _role play?_

Thankfully he didn't have time to let his thoughts stray too far on that subject as he suddenly heard footsteps and an odd buzzing noise coming closer and he had to duck behind a pedestal to avoid being seen. He carefully tried to sneak a look at the two as they passed - was that a _glowing buzzing screwdriver_ he was waving around? - but froze when Mr. Smith suddenly stopped dead and directed the weird device right in his direction. Blaine's heart was pounding madly in his ears as he tried to hold himself absolutely still.

The buzzing stopped abruptly as Mr. Smith did some more flailing with the thing and brought it to his face, seemingly reading something or other. He pursed his lips as if in thought while Kurt raised an eyebrow at him.

"Well? Did it find anything?"

Blaine held his breath as Mr. Smith seemed to be considering his answer. Eventually he flicked the weird tool again and waved his hand in a dismissive gesture.

"No no, nothing dangerous or alien here!"

Kurt rolled his eyes again (he seemed to be doing that a lot - it was a sharp contrast from the insecure and broken boy he had met that afternoon). "Well let's move on then! Honestly, you are like a child sometimes, getting distracted by this and that." He sounded exasperated, but he was smiling at the older man with a fond look in his eyes.

"Growing up is for boring people," the Englishman stated with a mock sneer before abruptly turning on his heel to hurry down the corridor again. "Let's go then, if you're in such a hurry. I JUST HOPE THAT NOBODY SEES US AND DECIDES TO FOLLOW US!"

The last part was said in a very loud voice that made both Kurt and Blaine inhale sharply for two completely different reasons. Blaine breathed a quiet sigh of relief and slumped against the wall as Kurt stomped down the hall after him whispering loud reprimands at Mr. Smith. He sat there quietly as he listened to their fading footsteps. Had that… been a hint or something? He was pretty sure that Mr. Smith had discovered him but… had that pointed shouting meant that he wanted him to follow them or to leave them alone?

He sat there for another few seconds before resolutely getting up from the floor. It didn't matter what his supposed teacher had said, he had to find out what the hell was going on here. And if a small voice in his head desperately needed to know how Kurt was involved with this man he didn't pay it any mind.

oOoOo

Kurt sighed as they opened what must have been the hundredth door tonight only to find nothing even remotely deadly or alien (though he had his suspicions about the freaky stuffed badger in the biology classroom). “Are you sure that there’s something wrong with this place? Maybe the TARDIS just ended up here at random and it’s completely alien free?”

The Doctor scoffed. “Of course she didn’t, Kurt, she always has a plan. Besides, almost no planet is completely free from alien inhabitants, they just have to be discreet if they want to live on Earth in this century. You’re all so very skittish sometimes.”

“… Right. Well, either way I’m not sure how many more rooms there can _be_ in this place if you exclude the dorms and I’m _not_ stepping a foot in there.”

The Doctor sighed. “No one’s making you search through the dorms, Kurt. I know you’re on edge because of this place but honestly, are you going to be like this all night? Where’s Eutaran 16 Kurt? I _miss_ Eutaran 16 Kurt.”

“Well, Eutaran 16 Kurt was walking the streets of the closest thing to Paris this universe has besides, you know, _Paris_ , not sneaking around in creepy dark hallways in Ohio in the middle of the night,” he snapped. He immediately regretted it when he saw the Doctor’s pout. “I’m sorry, you’re right. I’m being a bitch and it’s not fair to you. I know it doesn’t make sense but… being back here, so close to home, it makes me feel _vulnerable_ , and I _hate_ _it._ When I travel with you to all these beautiful, impossible places in your crazy little box it makes me feel invincible, like I’m… not above but sort of outside it all, like we’re in this little bubble where nothing can hurt me. Coming back here was just like a wakeup call and I guess I’m not handling it very well.”

The Doctor looked at him with those sad, impossibly old eyes and Kurt couldn’t stand to meet them for more than a few second. He sighed and leaned against the nearest wall. “I just can’t— _Ow!”_ He jumped back, startled as he had felt something hard press against his lower back. He grumbled as he glared at the door handle he’d accidently leaned against. “Where the hell did that door come from?”

Suddenly the Doctor grabbed onto his arm excitedly and grinned like Christmas had just arrived early. _“A perception filter!_ Oh, I love perception filters, “ he practically squealed and Kurt couldn’t resist the urge to roll his eyes. Then he sobered abruptly. “I don’t usually love what they’re hiding though.”

”That’s reassuring,” Kurt drawled. ”So what exactly _is_ a perception filter?”

“Well basically it means that something is… not _invisible_ exactly, just constantly hidden right out of your sight. You didn’t see this door until you accidentally touched it and forced your attention towards it because whatever’s in there doesn’t want you to see it.”

Kurt studied the door carefully. “Well… it can’t be anything too bad, right? People would have noticed if something really bad was lurking in there, wouldn’t they?”

The Doctor shifted awkwardly. “Um, actually, the last time I stumbled upon a door like this its resident had managed to stay there undetected for 12 years and almost caused the destruction of the whole planet.”

“… Oh,” Kurt said weakly. “That’s… not very reassuring either. Can’t your screwdriver figure out what’s in there before we open it?”

The Doctor hummed and dug his screwdriver out of his blazer pocket before pointing it towards the door. After a while he snapped it off and frowned. “I don’t know what’s in there but there’s a lot of energy whirling around on the other side of that door. Maybe we can just… peek inside or something. Just to get a grip of what we’re dealing with.” The Doctor nodded resolutely to himself and completely missed Kurt’s wide eyed look. “Yep, that’s what we’re gonna do.”

“Doctor—!” Kurt started but it was too late. The door was already opened and there was no going back.

oOoOo

Blaine had never been so thoroughly confused in his entire life. He had managed to stay undetected for the entire time that he’d been following the two men but their murmured conversations didn’t throw any light on the situation at all. As he listened to them blabbering about aliens and that TARDIS thing he absently thought that Cooper would have been in heaven if he’d been here right now. He smiled slightly to himself as he thought about his brother. Cooper may not be around all that much what with being so busy with his acting career back in LA, but he was one of the few people who had supported him unconditionally when he’d come out and he’d done a lot to help Blaine recover after the Sadie Hawkins incident. It was in moments like this that he missed his goofy brother the most.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when he suddenly heard a small cry of pain from Kurt and he scrambled to peek around the corner he was hiding behind. Kurt was glaring at some door while rubbing at his lower back and Blaine found himself frowning. He’d walked down this corridor at least twice a week ever since he’d transferred to Dalton and he had never noticed that door before. How could he have missed that? He listened as Mr. Smith (or “the Doctor” according to Kurt apparently) explained something called a perception filter and felt his stomach drop the more he heard. The man couldn’t possibly be right, of course he couldn’t. There was a perfectly logical reason to why he’d never noticed the door… right?

Either way, he didn’t like the way they were looking at that door, not in the least. He felt his heart jump as Mr. Smith reached for the handle and pulled it open while Kurt was scrambling to pull him back, both men stilling as the Englishman poked his head inside.

Everyone held their breaths.

After what felt like hours and several years off of Blaine’s life the silence was finally broken by a loud; _“Ohhhhhhhhhh,_ I see,” from Mr. Smith.

“What,” Kurt hissed. “Is it lethal? Does it have freaky fangs? Is it out to destroy the universe?”

He glanced briefly at Kurt. “No no, it’s…” he trailed off and Kurt looked slightly disturbed as a huge grin slowly spread on the man’s face. “It’s _babies.”_

“… Babies,” Kurt repeated skeptically. “I… _Babies?”_

 _“Babies!”_ Mr. Smith cooed back excitedly. “Oh, and their mother of course.” His eyes widened in realization. “Right, the mother.” He turned and poked his head through the door again. “I’m so sorry to bother you Ma’am, but would you mind if we came inside? We wouldn’t go anywhere near your children, I swear. We just want to talk for a bit.”

There was silence again for a while but eventually Mr. Smith smiled again. “Thank you!” he exclaimed and went inside, a skeptical Kurt trailing along after him.

Blaine just stared after them. It was official; Kurt and his History teacher were complete nut jobs. They were weird and delusional and Blaine should leave right now. Or better yet – report them to some kind of authority.

…

Except he really wanted to know what the hell was on the other side of that door. He silently cursed himself and his curiosity (he blamed Cooper’s bad influence) as he carefully crept towards the door. As he reached it he took a deep breath, peaked inside—

And promptly fell backwards with a scream because _holy shit._

The room was relatively big, probably a former common room or something and in the far corner was… was… _something_. Something that _definitely_ wasn’t human.

Kurt, Mr. Smith and the creature all snapped their heads around to stare at him and Blaine was honestly surprised that his heart hadn’t stopped completely yet. That he could now see what Mr. Smith must have referred to as ‘the babies’, three blue little things curled together at the bigger creature’s fee— _tentacles_ did not help at all.

“Blaine, wha— what the hell?” Kurt exclaimed with a horrified expression on his pale face. Mr. Smith, on the other hand, seemed far less concerned.

“Oh look, the infamous Blaine,” he trilled before he shoved so insistently at Kurt’s back that he almost fell over right alongside Blaine. “Why don’t you go give him the ‘humans are not alone in the universe, fancy that huh?’ speech while I have a nice chat with the lady, hmm?” He made a shooing motion, looking far too cheerful for Kurt’s taste. “Before he has an aneurysm would be nice, Kurt.”

“Right,” he breathed out before turning those gorgeous blue eyes on Blaine with a resigned look and offered his hand to help him up. “I completely understand if you want to either call the cops or a mad house right now and you certainly have no reason to trust us but please Blaine, just let me explain before you go running for the hills, okay?” Blaine nodded stiffly and accepted the hand, eyes fixated on the creatures right up until they disappeared around the corner as Kurt dragged him out into the corridor. As soon as they were out of sight he snapped his head around to stare at Kurt.

“Kurt, I… _Kurt_. Wha—“

“You promised that you’d let me explain before fetching the crazy pills, right?” Kurt interrupted as he held up a finger to shush him. Blaine shut his mouth. “Thank you,” Kurt said softly and sighed deeply. “Right. So, I’m not even going to ask you what in god’s name you’re doing wandering the school at 2 in the morning because, well, bigger picture. So, um, aliens are real, as you can see. There are billions of civilizations out there and sometimes a creature or two ends up on earth but they’re rarely harmful. I don’t know where that particular alien is from or why she’s here but the Doctor – that’s the man who’s speaking with her – usually handles that sort of thing.”

Blaine blinked. “Like, um, Men in Black or something?”

Kurt looked extremely affronted at that comparison. _“No,_ not like Men in Black, Blaine! We’re not the human-alien pest control or babysitters, geez.” He huffed and Blaine held up his hands in apology.

“Alright, alright, fine. So what are you then? “

Kurt visibly deflated and bit his lip (which was adorable and for god’s sake Blaine, _focus_ ). “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. Well, first of all the Doctor isn’t human. He’s ridiculously old and has traveled around in space, and time but let’s not focus on that for now, for god knows how long in this ship called the TARDIS. He doesn’t have a real goal in his travels as far as I know – he sort of just goes where he feels like or where he’s needed. And sometimes he picks up companions to travel with him.” He gestured towards himself. “Like me.”

Blaine took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he tried to process this information. He’d never thought they were alone in the universe, not really, but it had been an abstract thought and nothing he’d ever thought he’d actually get confirmed. _Okay, aliens are real, I can deal with that I guess,_ he thought as he took another deep breath and decided to just… well, go with it.

“Okay,” he breathed out as Kurt watched him with weary eyes, like he might have a mental breakdown at any second. The fear was mostly unfounded, Blaine thought. “So, you’re his _companion_. Does that… is that…”

Kurt frowned at him in confusion. “Is that what?” His eyes widened in realization before he burst into giggles while Blaine could feel himself blushing. “Oh my god, _Blaine_ that’s- no!” He managed to get out between giggles. “Blaine, I’m sixteen he’s a more than 900 year old alien! He’s _the Doctor_ \- that is just wrong on so many levels!”

“Well excuse me if I’m a bit confused about all this!” Blaine huffed, flustered at being laughed at and because Kurt laughing might have been the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. “I’m so sorry if I’m having a bit of a rough time processing the fact that this afternoon you were a bullied high school student here to spy on our choir and now you’re a space traveler! What was that anyway, just a cover story? Was anything you told me the truth or did I give my number to a goddamn _character?”_

Blaine almost regretted putting so much venom in his voice when Kurt flinched and for a second he looked so vulnerable again, like the boy he’d had coffee with in the Dalton common room, before he schooled his features into a pleading expression and almost grabbed for Blaine’s arm before he stopped himself. “No! No Blaine, please don’t think that. I _did_ go to McKinley, I _was_ a part of their glee club, and I _was_ going through hell in that sad excuse for a school.” He took a deep breath and swallowed harshly as if he’d rather do anything than think about that place. “And I would still be going through hell if the Doctor hadn’t asked me to come with him.”

Blaine looked carefully at the strange boy standing in front of him. He could be lying, but Blaine didn’t think so. He knew the look in those blue eyes all too well, had seen it in his own when he’d woken up from a nightmare and stared into the fear still lingering in his eyes through the bathroom mirror when he’d gone there to splash his face with cold water to drive the memories away. “So you ran as well.”

Kurt raised his eyes to meet Blaine’s, eyes that were far too tired to belong on a sixteen year old’s face. “Yes. I suppose I did.” His voice was quiet, almost contemplative, before his eyes came to life again and he lifted his chin in determination. “I will go back though, some day. No matter what he promised me I can’t stay away from Lima forever, I need to graduate if I’m ever going to get to New York and I need to get there Blaine, no matter what it takes. He took me there you know, to New York and Broadway. He took me to the opening nights of Wicked, Cats, My Fair Lady, Blaine, and I have never felt more _right_ in my entire life than when I saw those people on that stage. I need to be one of them someday and not even traveling in time and space can make me give that up. Besides…” He trailed off with a soft smile and Blaine’s breath caught in his throat. “I’d like to think of it as more of a… tactical retreat to gather my strength for the next battle.”

Blaine had never really believed that you could fall for someone you’d only known for a day.

He was seriously starting to believe he’d been wrong.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Mr. Sm— the Doctor came sauntering out of the common room again with a big grin on his face. “Time to pack our bags and hop back to the TARDIS Kurt, we have to give this nice family a lift home!”

Blaine’s heart sank.

“Wait, that’s it? You’re not going to explain why they’re even here in the first place?” Kurt drawled, looking extremely unimpressed.

The Doctor snapped his fingers and perked up.”Oh right, silly me. So, the lovely lady in there is something called a Djazolean and they live off energy that comes from the earth of their planet. This one got separated from her people when they came here sometime during the 1950’s and got left behind on Earth. Now, she could have managed to try and get herself home but she was pregnant at the time and Djazolean females have a tendency to hide until their babies are born so she decided to wait, setting up a perception filter and feeding on bits and pieces of energy from the students and teachers at Dalton – they can do that you see, as an emergency life support when they’re away from home. Nothing harmful, just a little bit of energy at a time. But now that the babies are born the—“

“W-wait,” Blaine interrupted with a frown. “They were born recently? But that means…”

“That she’s been pregnant for over 60 years,” the Doctor finished happily. “It’s not that long really, considering that they usually live to be 300. Anyway, Djazolean infants are hungry little rascals and they’ll just grow hungrier if they don’t get back home to get the energy they’re supposed to eat and we really don’t want three hungry adolescent Djazoleans roaming the world in a few years so it really would be best if we just took them home now. Hey Blaine, do you fancy coming with us for the trip?”

Blaine blinked. Had he just said what he thought he’d said? “E-Excuse me?”

“Do you want to come with us for the trip?” the Doctor said slowly as if he was talking to a particularly slow child. “Just drop them off, see the planet and then be back before those boring classes of yours start in the morning, hm?”

“I…” What the hell was he supposed to do? On the one hand this was absolutely insane, he had no reason to trust these people and he had n way of knowing if it would even be safe. On the other hand he would never, never, get a chance like this again, a chance to see just a peek of what was out there and… and it would mean spending more time with Kurt before he had to leave. Kurt who was standing absolutely still with his eyes fixed on Blaine like he was holding his breath in anticipation for his answer. Oh god, why did he even have to think about it. He could practically hear Cooper’s voice in his head saying, _‘For fuck’s sake squirt, you just had a gorgeous guy, aliens and space travel handed to you on a silver platter – if you don’t take this opportunity right now I will hunt you down and choke you with your own ridiculous bowties!’_

“Can we stop by my brother’s house as well?”

The Doctor blinked at him. “I suppose we could afford to make a detour. Why, making sure to say your goodbyes in case you don’t ever want to come back?”

“Is that an offer? Because if it is I would like to pack a bag just in case – I’m not going anywhere without my lobster cardigan and bowties.” His voice was a bit shaky but fuck if he cared about that right now – he did feel a small surge of terror when the Doctor’s face suddenly lit up in the most manic grin Blaine had ever seen on anyone and he had grown up with Cooper. Kurt just stared at Blaine in horrified shock as the Doctor actually squealed.

“Bowties!”

“Lobster cardigan,” Kurt croaked weakly like the thought of such a garment physically pained him.

“He wears bowties!” the Doctor squealed again and oh god, was he jumping in excitement? “Kurt, we have to keep this one, please let us keep him pleasepleaseplease?”

“If you let me burn the lobster cardigan we can keep anyone you like,” Kurt said weakly.

Blaine wasn’t sure if he should back out while he still could.

oOoOo

Blaine had changed his mind once he sat down heavily on the TARDIS stairs by the control panel with a gigantic smile on his face.

I’ve just been to another planet, “He said dazedly as Kurt chuckled and sat down next to him. “Kurt, it was… it was _beautiful.”_ He turned to face Kurt and his smile softened as he met his eyes. “I think I’m going to take you guys up on that offer to travel for a bit longer, if that’s all right.”

Kurt face split into the most breathtaking smile Blaine had ever seen. “I’d like that, Blaine.”

Meanwhile the Doctor kept fiddling with the TARDIS’s controls and pretended that he didn’t see them staring into each other’s eyes like… well, like two love sick teenagers.

“Playing matchmaker now, are we gorgeous?” he murmured to the control panel. “You bad, bad girl.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is how I decided to end it. I was planning on writing more but then real life got in the way and Teen Wolf happened and I just... well. But I enjoyed writing this story and I hope you liked what I was able to get down on paper. :)


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